How to be C.R.A.S.E.
Now, i know that you are dying to become one of C.R.A.S.E. (pronounced as crazy), but first you must know how exactly to work the C.R.A.S.E. funk. First you should probably know that C.R.A.S.E. stands for Chelene, Reanna, Adrianna, Sam, and Emily. The founders of this marvelous middle school circus clan were myself and my friend Sam. The next to be introduced into... us, was Reanna. Now i must first say that reanna absolutely loathed Sam, the reason for that being that in 6th grade I always hung out with Reanna and other Sam, Sam Sepulveda, and we were all best friends, it was great... and then Sam Portillo came. I started to hang out with her and she was hated by Sam S. and Reanna for 'stealing me away'. Eventually I convinced them to give her a chance, and all was well. Next to be conjoined with the freak show of C.R.A.S.E. was Chelene, we call her Chu-Chu, everyone calls her Chu-Chu. There is not much of a story there, other than the fact that we all loved her and just got her first, before all the other cliques (of evil).The last the join our charade of insanity was Adrianna. We all hated her so much. She was little witch. If she had something to say, she would say it, and if you stood in her way of that, well then you introduced yourself into a life threatening situation. She would bite your head off if you got any where near her. Naturally she became one of us! I'm not sure where along the road that happened, but it did! Okay enough with the history lecture, and onto the 'How- to'! Go!Firstly when you get to school, feeling all self-conscious of your new outfit or hairstyle or lip gloss, you must immediately go sit on the top of the stairs acting as nonchalant as possible. most likely, your friends will be coming around any moment, having already done several slow-moving laps around the school. They will run up the stairs and give you a big hug, and tell you- not ask you- to come walk with them, you will not have a choice unless you say 'its too hot/ cold'. In this case you must quickly suggest going to the cafeteria before they once again begin walking, towing you along with them. When you go to the cafeteria, the first thing anyone looks for is an ex- boyfriend of yours or someone elses'. They will then walk you to the table he's sitting at (assuming they saw your ex first) and leave you the last seat, right next to him. As you later walk away, your friends will gush to you about how they felt that the connection was still as strong as ever, even though you broke up a month ago because he cheated constantly (or something like that). Of course you must respond to this with the "I'm so over him! Was he really smiling as me?" rant, to please those who didn't like him, and those who did.
When the bell rings, you will dawdle in the cafeteria waiting for your friends to wrap up their conversation as you stand there sighing as loudly as humanly possible, ya' know, give them the hint. While you're all running up the stairs you will run into your guy friend and talk to him, knowing that behind your back, the rest of C.R.A.S.E. is making kissey faces about it because you've never really had too many guy friends before.you will then dash into Spanish class two seconds before the late bell after a tearful goodbye with one of C.R.A.S.E. as she departs to another class. Tragic. You slip into your seat next to (surprise surprise) your ex- boyfriend in the very back row. Ms. Lopez begins talking about the difference between conocer and saber and how to conjugate them but you've heard it before, so, though you love 'er, you begin to doodle. As the bell for second period rings, you and the rest of C.R.A.S.E. walk out together (other than Adrianna) and go to social studies. Chu-Chu can only walk you guys there and Reanna doesn't come at all, so we hug and then enter. You must then spend the first ten minutes of second period trying to convince Sam and Darcy (nearly a member of C.R.A.S.E.) to come sit at your table, while they do the same even though you both know that neither side will prevail. Mr. Olivas finally gets the class to shut up, and so you sit there zoning out for the rest of class, nodding vaguely when asked for 'the answer'. Walking to science you are accompanied by Adrianna. you talk and complain until given at least two detentions, when you finally give up and rely on vague nodding. Fourth period T.A. you are alone in terms of C.R.A.S.E., and very bored with the kindergartners. They are adorable, but so stubborn! Oh, well.
After fourth period is lunch, and lunch is FUN! All of C.R.A.S.E. is there, except for those with detention, and although your ex is there, so is everyone elses! You then all play some sort of twisted "truth or dare" while you throw food you don't want at your most hated teachers' cars (they unknowingly park immediately next to the small Ramada we all sit under). Once Truth or dare has died out, you poke fun at your friends by 'reminiscing' together about the awkward times between them and their ex. Ah, fun. Suddenly you must dive under the table while your friends throw their backpacks on top of you. The reason for this? Ms. So-and-so is coming with a list of the missing detention-ers and you're one of them. Of course she doesn't find you even if you move slightly, because your friends, loyal as they are, shift their feet to cover your noises and movement up. Usually though she comes back from the other side later and catches you that way... which kind of sucks but, you tried. The funny thing about lunch though, is that you only get 30 minutes, so when it rings you all start whining and yelling about "the stupid fickin bell" and how you "weren't done fricken eating, what the frick". The rest of the day goes by quickly, you barley notice it! You and Adrianna make fun of Ms. Hofmanns non- existent butt, but that is about all you remember. It is then required of you to clamber into your car whining for a Starbucks, but then you have fulfilled yourequirements for the day! Exhausting right? But fun. Oh! one last requirement- Your name must be Chelene Angle Lopez, Reanna Renee Leon, Adrianna Natali Something Something Rodriguez, Samantha Marie Porillo, or Emily Marigold Hall, but thats about it! you are know one of C.R.A.S.E.! Congrats!
On Monday, June 16, 2008 at 6/16/2008 11:34:00 AM